In this case, curiosity didn’t kill the cat, curiosity hurled a head of lettuce at the cat. Meet Heidi, she’s a hoot! I’m giggling because this is how my favorite character, Stephanie Plum describes her grandmother. You know the drill, google it. Anyhow, Heidi’s new to the company, but right off the bat you can tell she’s all those adjectives every company looks to employ; ambitious, energetic, determined and friendly. She’s also the one who’s been sniffing around me and V’s salad bowls.
Most are intimidated by the enormity of our salad station, but Heidi willingly sought out joining our new found club. That should tell you something about her mental state. She’s offered to start contributing to this Lord of the Flies type scenario with organic carrots, humus, broccoli and a new salad dressing option, ranch. Time to sound the conch shell, me and V are excited for new fixins’ and fresh conversation.
You can learn A LOT about someone over the course of a salad. Heidi’s a self-professed helper. That person who will stop to help someone stranded on the side of the road. Why? I don’t know. Most of her rescues seem to occur on her way to work. Is this funny you ask? Yes, because her work attire usually includes a pencil skirt and heels, and in my humble opinion that’s a recipe for disaster when it comes to emergency roadside service. She’s also that person who doesn’t realize that everything she does is funny to watch.
Did you know a case of copy paper weighs 50 pounds? Heidi insists on carrying these ridiculously heavy cases up a flight of stairs. Yes, she’s still wearing a pencil skirt and heels. Not me, I’m that person at the bottom of the steps saying things like, “Why don’t you get one of the guys to carry that for you?”, “You know, you’re going to put your back out doing that! “ or “You go first, I want a good laugh when you fall.” Are you seeing a pattern in my behavior? No wonder I struggle to make friends.
It wasn’t long and Heidi got on board with not carrying cases, so what’s her plan you ask? Order a dolly. A couple days later her package arrives and guess who’s there to watch this scene unfold? You couldn’t pay me to stay away!
Hi-heels – check
Dolly – check
Heavy-ass paper – check!
Heidi’s on the 3rd step from the bottom of the stairs deciding if she should go up one more step before she starts her tug-a-war challenge. The distance between her and the dolly was so great, Hulk Hogan couldn’t pull this up one step! Not Heidi, she's not giving up on this challenge so easily. Holding her breath and straining to pull as hard as she could she stood motionless, but the dolly didn’t budge.
Realizing the distance issue, she came down a step and managed to drag the 60 lb. industrial dolly and 50 lb. case of paper up the first step. In a full-blown sweat, she says, “why are these wheels so small?” Crying with laughter I say, “It’s a dolly, what did you expect?” At this point, we both are struggling to stand as we cried with laughter. I’m not sure how, but she managed to pull it together and return to her task. Now, she is basically carrying both the dolly and case of paper up each step. All I can get out between bouts of snorting laughter is, “Yep, works like a charm!”