Fair notice - TMI
This kale thing might be working. I’m praying this is not a fluke, but the BIG [wink-wink] IBS issue has stopped. This is crazy and I’m not sure how to react to this! I’ve been dealing with this crap (literally) for 15 years. Time for me to climb atop that big-ass hill, spread my arms and sing ‘The hills are alive with the sound of music!’
My plan was to start these changes in January, but new found freedom has me eyeballing my list of ailments. Dr. Berg says to eat 7 to 10 cups of veggies per day and I think I recall Charlotte Gerson saying that 51 percent of our diets should be raw. So as you probably already guessed, I’ve got another full-time job. Making salads with my trusted side kick, V!
I have what you might call a “developed” salad pallet and I prefer a wide-variety of salad fixins’. Spring greens, spinach, tomatoes, onions, sweet peppers, seeds, nuts, avocados, raspberries, blueberries, salami, cooked chicken, olives (black or green), eggs and few other assorted cheeses from the great state of Wisconsin. For dressing, S&P and vinegar & olive oil, keep it simple - no sense in making it too complicated. Yes, I’m aware, it sounds like a lot, but there a two of us. V might be tiny, but she can down a butter burger like nobody’s business.
Ready to start my day, I packed up the fixins’ and drove to work. The normal person would make a couple trips to carry in this large load, not me. Purse on my arm, laptop bag around my neck and every conceivable bag and nap sack I could carry in each hand. I’m not gonna lie, I looked like a Sherpa carrying gear to base camp for the Mt. Everest climbers. Thank goodness someone got the door for me. He asked, “Is there a customer meeting today?”, proudly I said, “oh no, this is my lunch”.
I basically took over the only fridge in the breakroom to store my plethora of fruit and veggies. I imagined co-workers opening the fridge and saying, “OH DANG!” I know this sounds selfish, but organic stuff needs space to breathe, besides me and V would plow through this stuff in no time! No time to waste, I need to get to work before it’s...
Bork, bork, Bork! Picture the Swedish Chef from The Muppet Show with pots and spoons flying everywhere. I forgot how much energy goes into prepping. First you get everything out of the fridge, then starts the washing and drying, slicing and dicing and finally assembling your salad. No wonder people lose weight, I’m in a full blown sweat at this point! Jeez Louise, can I eat now?
After a couple of days of this racket, people have started to notice not only the mess, but this new found buzz in the breakroom. Most, considerately say nothing and slide past me and V to get their lunches. I think it has something to do with V’s knife skills, but I could be wrong. Some are curious, and ask a few questions before quickly returning to their desk, but there’s one who slightly interested in joining our pop-up salad café.
Time for me to pump the brakes on this post, besides I think Netflix is calling me.